Words at the grave: Twenty years

These are the words, translated from Hebrew to English, that I shared with friends and family gathered today at the grave of my daughter Malki, and beside the grave of her dear friend Michal Raziel. The girls are buried side by side, having been murdered side by side in the terror attack on Jerusalem's Sbarro pizzeria on August 9, 2001. In the Jewish calendar, today - the 20th day of the month of Av - is the twentieth anniversary of that date.

(The Hebrew text is below the English.)

* * *  

Who would have believed that one can carry around a broken heart for twenty years? 

The intensity of the pain and longing hasn't faded one iota with time. The memories of life with Malki in our midst are such happy ones that they only sadden. I usually banish them - just to shield myself. 

What celebration Malki brought us by her mere presence - truly, celebration. With her wide smile, her perpetual giving, her generosity, her heavenly flute-playing, her innumerable artistic creations, her passion for life.

If the years of grief have taught me anything it is that for this loss there is no comfort. The words that often reverberate in my mind are: Malki, were you there or did I only dream? (Perhaps, by Israeli poet, Rachel)

It is impossible for Arnold and me to mark the 20th anniversary of the murders of Malki, her friend of Michal and of the other thirteen victims of the Sbarro massacre without mentioning the ongoing travesty of justice. 

We are determined to continue pursuing justice, G-d willing, as long as the murderer, Ahlam Tamimi, enjoys freedom and as long as we have strength for the struggle. 

May we witness the realization of that goal soon and in our time.

* * * 

מי היה מאמין שאפשר לסחוב לב שבור עשרים שנה? 

עצמת הכאב והגעגועים לא עומעמה במאומה עם הזמן. 

הזכרונות של החיים בעוד מלכי הייתה אתנו הם כל כך שמחים שהם אינם משמחים. אני מבריחה אותם לרוב - בכדי להתגונן מהכאב. איזו חגיגה הביאה לנו מלכי בעצם נוכחותה - כן, ממש חגיגה. עם החיוך הרחב, הנתינה, הנדיבות, הנגינה השמימית בחליל, אינספור יצירות האומנות, ההתלהבות מהחיים. אם שנות האבל לימדו אותי משהו, הרי זה שאין נחמה לאבדן הזה. המלים שמהדהדות בי תכופות הן "מלכי, ההיית או חלמתי חלום"?

אי אפשר לי ולארנולד לציין 20 שנה להירצחם של מלכי ומיכל ו-13 קרבנות סבארו הנוספים בלי להזכיר את אי הצדק המתמשך. אנחנו נחושים להמשיך לרדוף את הצדק אי"ה כל עוד הרוצחת תמימי נהנית מהחופש וכל עוד יש בנו את הכוחות למאבק. 

יהי רצון שנזכה לראות את התממשות הצדק במהירה בימינו.

On failing to move our fight for justice to center-stage

King Abdullah II of Jordan addresses a Congressional committee

As Malki's yahrzeit nears (the twentieth day of the month of Av in the Hebrew calendar which this year falls on July 29, two days from now), we are digesting the failure of last week's efforts to bring our fight for justice to center-stage.

Despite some of our terrific media exposure, Jordan's King Abdullah scored his customary adulation - groveling, actually - from his US hosts. They included the White House, Congress and major media outlets. And that was across-the-board, bi-partisan groveling.

The king's last interview (actually the only interview he appears to have given to the American media throughout his entire lengthy visit (text here via Jordan Times; video here via CNN), was with CNN's Fareed Zakaria who rates by most, myself included, as level-headed, intelligent and insightful. 

So I was surprised and disgusted to watch him behave as sycophantically as every other American has in Abdullah's presence. Each sentence was preceded with "Your Highness" (he used the expression seven times). And his last line was "Your Highness, it always an honor and a pleasure to talk to you."

I invite anyone to explain to me why champions of democracy are so obsequious to a ruthless, unelected totalitarian dictator; a leader who protects a self-confessed mass-murdering terrorist and refuses to extradite her to the US despite its demand that he do so in accordance with a valid extradition treaty signed and ratified 26 years ago.

Mr. Zakariah, please explain why you studiously avoided this issue in your lengthy interview - "wide-ranging" was how the Jordanian press described it. 

Source: FBI website

Explain why the fact that Abdullah harbors one of the FBI's Most Wanted Terrorists didn't detract one iota from the respect you lavished on him. 

How has he captivated you? With his impeccable mastery of the English language? His almost-British accent? His glibness? His beautiful, designer clad, and equally articulate, wife?

But Zakaria is in good company. Neither President Biden nor Secretary of State Blinken mentioned the Tamimi travesty of justice either when they met with Abdullah this past week. Since videos of those conversations weren't released, we have no way of knowing whether they were also as sycophantic as Zakaria toward a ruler, don't forget, who is recipient of US$1.6 billion in aid annually.

This king-worship - a monarch who remains in power by the grace of US benefaction - is as baffling as it is infuriating.

Help for our cause from the Washington Post

This may not be an op ed as my husband and I had in yesterday's Wall Street Journal. But it is nonetheless an achievement.

In my assessment, this exposure has nudged Jordan's outrageous behavior a bit closer to the headlines. And we owe a huge debt of gratitude to AP journalist Aamer Madhani who inserted the Tamimi scandal into his coverage of the Abdullah-Biden tete a tete. 

He did that despite the absence of any indication that the leaders discussed it at all. In fact, he devoted a full third of his brief article to our struggle.

So, without further ado, here is today's tiny triumph as it appeared in the Washington Post and in dozens of other syndication clients of Associated Press:

Biden calls Jordan king a loyal ally in ‘tough neighborhood’

by: AAMER MADHANI, Associated Press | Posted July 19, 2021 

FILE – In this May 26, 2021 file photo, Jordan’s King Abdullah II listens during a meeting with Secretary of State Antony Blinken, in Amman, Jordan. (AP Photo/Alex Brandon, Pool, File)

WASHINGTON (AP) — President Joe Biden praised King Abdullah II of Jordan as a stalwart ally in a “tough neighborhood” as the two leaders huddled at the White House on Monday, a meeting that came at a pivotal moment for both leaders in the Middle East.

Last week a Jordanian state security court sentenced two former officials to 15 years in prison over an alleged plot against the king uncovered earlier this year that involved Abdullah’s half-brother.

Meanwhile, Biden, who has put much of his foreign policy focus on China and Russia in the early going, faces some difficult issues in the Middle East. He is dealing with stepped-up attacks against U.S. troops in Iraq and Syria by Iranian-backed militias at the same moment that his administration is trying to nudge Iran back to the negotiating table to revive the nuclear agreement that Donald Trump abandoned during his presidency.

“You have always been there, and we will always be there for Jordan,” Biden said during an Oval Office meeting with Abdullah and his son, the Crown Prince Hussein.

Abdullah had a difficult relationship with Trump, who he saw as undercutting any chance for a peace deal between Israelis and Palestinians with his 2017 declaration of Jerusalem as Israel’s capital. He also chaffed at the Trump administration’s pursuit of what officials called the Abraham Accords — deals with Bahrain, the United Arab Emirates, Sudan and Morocco that normalized relations with Israel but left out the Palestinians.

Biden has no plans to reverse U.S. recognition of Jerusalem as the capital. His administration has even praised the Trump-brokered accords — a rare instance of the Democratic administration speaking positively of the former administration.

Biden planned to stress to Abdullah in private that the accords are not an “end run” on finding the way to a peace deal that includes a Palestinian state, according to a senior administration official who was not authorized to comment publicly and spoke on condition of anonymity.

Abdullah, for his part, praised Biden for “setting the standard” internationally in the battle against COVID-19. The U.S. delivered 500,000 vaccines to Jordan days ahead of the king’s visit. The king also appeared to make clear that he was looking to reset the U.S. – Jordan relationship after a four bumpy years with Trump.

“You can always count on me, my country, and many of our colleagues in the region,” Abdullah said.

The two leaders discussed the situation in Syria — more than 1 million Syrian refugees have fled the war-ravaged nation for Jordan — and a wobbly security situation in Iraq, an administration official said. At least eight drone attacks have targeted the U.S. military presence in Iraq since Biden took office in January, as well as 17 rocket attacks.

Abdullah is set to have a working breakfast Tuesday with Vice President Kamala Harris and to meet with Secretary of State Antony Blinken.

The meeting with Biden was also a chance for the king to spotlight his closeness to Biden following the attempted coup.

Bassem Awadallah, who has U.S. citizenship and once served as a top aide to King Abdullah II, and Sharif Hassan bin Zaid, a member of the royal family, were found guilty of sedition and incitement charges. Both men denied the charges and Awadallah’s U.S. lawyer said his client alleged he was tortured in Jordanian detention and fears for his life.

They are alleged to have conspired with Prince Hamzah, the king’s half-brother. Biden, who has known Abdullah for years, was quick to publicly express “strong U.S. support for Jordan” and praise the king’s leadership after details of the coup attempt were unveiled in April.

It’s unclear if Biden raised the United States’ long-standing call to extradite Ahlam Ahmad al-Tamimi, a Palestinian woman living in Jordan who is wanted by the U.S. on a charge of conspiring to use a weapon of mass destruction against American nationals.

The Trump administration last year indicated it was considering withholding aidto Jordan in a bid to secure al-Tamimi’s extradition. She was convicted in Israel of a 2001 bombing of a Tel Aviv restaurant that killed 15 people, including two American citizens. She has lived freely in Jordan since she was released in a Hamas-Israel prisoner swap in 2011.

Biden administration officials have previously made clear to Jordan that the extradition of al-Tamimi, who is on the FBI’s most wanted list, is of “high-interest” to the United States, according to the administration official.

Arnold Roth, whose 15-year-old daughter, Malki, was killed in the bombing, noted that Biden has spoken frequently of “decency” and “dignity” as paramount values in how he’ll run his administration. Roth and his wife, Frimet, wrote Blinken and other administration officials last month calling on the administration to press Abdullah for extradition. He said they received no response from the administration beyond acknowledgement that their letter was received.

“I can’t think of two words that more powerfully encapsulate what we’ve been deprived of in all of our dealings with the U.S. government,” Roth said.

Copyright 2021 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Disability pride

The late Effie Ben Baruch 

I am sorry to concede that I learned about July being Disability Pride Month from none other than ADI's Facebook page. 

Actually - and ADI omitted this point - it is recognized as such only in New York City where Mayor Bill de Blasio declared it in honor of the 25th anniversary of the Americans With Disabilities Act (ADA). Parades are held in a number of American cities including Los Angeles, New York City, San Francisco and San Antonio. 

New York City is hosting a parade to commemorate the landmark legislation and as a born-and-bred New Yorker I'll jump on that bandwagon. 

While ADI did disseminate this helpful information, it is also hard at work entrenching the institutionalization of babies, children and adults with disabilities in large, locked structures far from the rest of society. 

So, you do the math. I'd say this mention of July doesn't clear them even one iota. In fact, this month is being touted thus: 

"....not only a time for the disabled community to celebrate who they are, but it's also a time to better understand how you can become a better ally to our disabled community members." 

And I will attempt to do just that.

Several days ago, advocates for disability rights in Israel learned that a former caregiver, Ali Akaria, who worked in Ramat Haifa, an institution for people with disabilities was sentenced to nine months of community service after he was convicted of attacking Ephraim Ben Baruch. 

The latter, a helpless 27 year old resident in Ramat Haifa with cognitive and behavioral impairments, endured repeated abuse there by other caregivers which, it is suspected, caused his eventual death in 2019. 

 In his judgement against Akaria, Judge Zair Falach wrote that the defendant asked for the court's mercy and he responded: 

"If the defendant had behaved with mercy toward his charge he would not find himself being judged before me. The defendant's request for mercy is an infuriating request when the defendant himself behaved with an absence of mercy toward the deceased charge."

A propos "infuriating", the fact that the judge's ire translated into several months of community service has had that same effect on the disability activist community. That slap on the wrist has galvanized them to redouble their fight for an end to institutionalization. Protest rallies, petitions, PR campaigns and lawsuits are all being weighed as the next step toward that goal. 

Parents and siblings constantly share their desperation to transfer their loved ones to in-community living in small hostels. 

Pull out your magnifying glass to see what has us very excited:
My daughter Haya is kicking a bit!

In Israel this isn't an option for most. As one of them noted: 

"...within the system of checks and balances that exists when residents go out to activities and live in the community among neighbors, leave their homes, a case of ongoing abuse would be exposed. The institution of Ramat Haifa - like Neve ha-Irus which we recently experienced - is an isolated island where anything can happen. Going out into the community ensures the safety of residents while the Ministry argues that an institution is the most protected place."

Somebody in that Whatsapp group posted an invitation to an ADI-sponsored Zoom event for parents of children with disabilities. Shocked and dismayed to see them ensnared in another ADI trap, I reminded them what the ADI enterprise is really about. You can help spread the word too! This is the month for you to help spread the message.